How to Identify a Difficult Mother-in-Law by Her Facial Features
When a woman thinks about marriage, the most important thing is her own feelings—the desire to spend a lifetime together. A close second is whether she can get along with her future mother-in-law. For many women, that’s a major concern.
Historically, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship has been notoriously tense—often likened to water and fire. At its core is a tug-of-war over a man’s affection: one fears her son will listen to his wife and overlook his mother, while the other fears her husband will defer to his mother and disregard her. That dynamic breeds conflict and misunderstanding. Some mothers-in-law make things difficult to assert their status, and some daughters-in-law can be just as challenging, sparking constant verbal skirmishes.
For a man caught between his mother and his wife, it can feel helpless. One is his beloved mother, the other his cherished wife—both are incredibly important, making the situation seem impossible to navigate. The tension even gives rise to the absurd hypothetical: if both his wife and his mother fell into the water, whom should he save first? Everyone understands the dilemma—and how unreasonable the question is—because each person has both a mother and, if married, a spouse, making it impossible to weigh one against the other. For married men, it’s a pressing question with no real answer.
In short, when disharmony arises between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law, there are reasons behind it. Dong Shihong explores their issues through the lens of physiognomy, examining which types of mothers-in-law may be unreasonable or harbor ill intent.
First: Mothers-in-law with angular cheeks and thin lips
Mothers-in-law with these features tend to be overly calculating and refuse to accept any perceived loss in dealings with their daughters-in-law. They are often domineering, believing that as elders their views must be followed. While expecting some care from a daughter-in-law can be reasonable, this type can be excessively overbearing. They have sharp tongues, seize on any shortcoming, rattle off complaints like firecrackers, and enjoy gossiping with neighbors.
Second: Mothers-in-law with downturned outer eye corners and prominent brow bones
These mothers-in-law often come across as selfish and self-important, carrying a sense of superiority. If a daughter-in-law comes from a less affluent background, they may look down on her and criticize her as unworthy of their son. They also expect daughters-in-law to handle all the household chores while maintaining an air of superiority, which can feel oppressive. Generally, such mothers-in-law are not well regarded by others.
Third: Mothers-in-law with hooked noses and uneven bridges
These mothers-in-law tend to be jealous and competitive, often believing other daughters-in-law are better than their own. If their daughter-in-law falls short of expectations, they will nag endlessly. They expect their daughters-in-law to be obedient to them or to their sons at all times, making life with them feel like a never-ending struggle.
Fourth: Mothers-in-law with prominent foreheads and high noses
Mothers-in-law with these features are quick-tempered and critical. They have high expectations and don’t recognize that younger generations may live differently. They often criticize their daughters-in-law publicly without regard for others’ feelings, showing an impatient personality. Even the best daughters-in-law may find such mothers-in-law hard to tolerate.
Fifth: Mothers-in-law with pointed, thin ears and sparse eyebrows
These mothers-in-law are very strict, especially about their sons’ finances. They often want to control their sons’ money, fearing their daughters-in-law might be deceitful or take advantage. Their excessive vigilance can lead them to treat daughters-in-law like outsiders, which may create emotional distance between husband and wife and damage the relationship.